For the Last Time, this Side of Heaven, " Dear Doc"

                                 Me at the Mile High Swinging Bridge in NC. Photo by Brian. 

My friend, Lynne, also known as " Doc" by her students-- went to her Heavenly home this week after a long illness. 

 I am grateful that she was able to be with her dearest ones during her last hours.  My heart is full of gratitude for over 20 years of sharing our lives--- mostly through email. It saddens me that I will never again begin an e-mail with " Dear Doc". Yet I am comforted that she's watching over me and all others with whom she shared her life. 

 For the last time.. this side of Heaven....

 Dear Doc: 

  Doc, you were by far the toughest, best choir conductor I knew. I loved how you pushed the entire choir to do our best work and to give us opportunities to grow musically. Lately I've found myself humming the tune to the UWF Alma Mater--- a tune that you had composed that will be some of your permanent legacy at the University. 

  I so enjoyed the two seasons of Gulf Coat Chorale music-making we shared. I remember you teasing me about being the biggest Beatles' fan  in the Chorale, in spite of being born in the mid-1970's. The _ John , Paul George & Satchmo_ concert was so much fun. 

 But you were more than a college choir conductor-- you also taught me about living a Christ-centered life. You were there during my darkest days at UWF, and I am grateful for you support and faith that I could get justice for myself & other women. I can help others in similar situations because you believed me & got me to understand that I am in control of my own body. 

More importantly, you also present for some of the joy-filled occasions of life: such a playing the organ at St Francis Episcopal Church, Gulf Breeze for my wedding. I know that the administrative assistant there misspelling of your first name annoyed you, but it was God's Providence that the regular organist at St Francis, Gulf Breeze { my church at the time} was away on vacation, because I always wanted you to play for a wedding that I told you years ago that would never happen. 

 You said: " Just wait: the right person will come along , and you'll know it." 

 Okay-- you were correct yet again ! 

Some of the advice from you that I still carry with me is this " When you are feeling sorry for yourself, do something for someone else. Fast"

 It's been rough as my anticipatory grief transformed to active grief upon hearing the news of your Homegoing, but I will promise to continue to live a servant's life-- aided by the wonderful people at St Christopher's Episcopal Church. I'm glad that we had some more one-one-one time together before the pandemic hit. More importantly, I am glad we got a chance for one last in-person visit together at your house. I know how much you like flowers & was blessed to be able to deliver some altar flowers from my church to your home. 

 Thank you for letting me into your world as well. Sharing your life stories with me have helped me grow in faith and make wiser choices in my life. Thank you for never judging me when I did make poor choices. I'm a bit wiser  and much more schooled in Who Jesus is than I was before we met at that first UWF Singers rehearsal. 

 Looking back, I now see that it was no " accident" that I needed a Fine Arts  Credit & did not want to take Art History. :) I love to sing as much as I dislike Art History. I'd rather make art {including Music} than study other people's art from centuries before I was born. 

I love you, Doc. And it is my prayer that the second half of my life will be a credit to all I've learned from you. I miss you, but know you are healthy & whole now & that we'll eventually see each other again. 

Love

Sarah