Pensacola Is Home

 

                                            One big reason why I love living here.....

I'm from " somewhere up north". I cannot deny that living in Central/Northern Appalachia has shaped me. My experiences there are part of my DNA. I cannot change that fact. 

However, Northwest Florida , and especially Pensacola, has been home for more than half my life. 

Recently, there has been some news about some rampant anti-Semitism occurring in Butler County, Pennsylvania, where I was born and where some blood kin still live. 

To be honest, anti-Semitism never went away-- especially in rural counties such as where I was born. Granted, the anti-Jewish and racist rhetoric was not as bold as I remember it being when I was a child, but it was still there and often in my face. I remember working one summer for a family friend's business when the matriarch made a comment to me " at least she/he did not Jew us down. 

She said this to me, a teen employee. It was NOT okay and a very firmly told her that I am Jewish on my mother's side of my family and do not use such language in my presence again. 

Oddly enough, I kept my job and managed to earn the respect of the old woman. She might have respected the spunk I showed in standing up for myself and my mother's family. 

There was another incident in high school when I did " talk back" to a teacher wo had been spewing anti-Semitism in his classroom for weeks. I'd reached my breaking point and lashed out at him. My efforts earned me a trip to the vice-principal's office and an after school detention {leading to being benched at basketball for " insubordination".}

Whatever. I'd do it again. 

I say all this to make a point that I've never felt any anti-Semitism here in Pensacola. Here, that weird girl whose mouth got her in trouble sometimes has found a home. 

I feel confident that my beautiful multiracial nephew and niece can visit in safety and that my brother can hold his wife's hand in public and not feel threatened. 

I am in no hurry to return to western Pennsylvania/ eastern Ohio, because many of my memories there were not happy. 

I feel nothing but sadness and shame when I think about where I grew up. 

I'm safe here. I'm thriving here. This is home. 

My people are here. 

Amen. 

Sarah Beth McCarren