I'm making strides in my Piano Journey. My teacher was pleased with the progress I've made since my last lesson a couple weeks ago. My sight-reading skills have improved, I even played a new-to-me song 'sight unseen" for my teacher and am pleased at the results.
It has been a rough start to 2023 for me. Brian and I lost a dear friend suddenly to a cardiac arrest in February. To be honest, I am still processing this loss: unlike most of the other losses in my life, this one caught me totally by surprise. He was 53 years old, and Brian and I have been friends with his entire family for well over a decade. Anthony was an older brother to me: We picked on each other as only siblings do but I loved him as one of my chosen family. I've known their eldest child since they were in kindergarten, and now they will soon graduate from high school. His widow is a friend and also a spiritual sister of The Order of The Daughters of the King.
When Doc died, my priest's advice about moving through grief helped a lot. She said " The only way around something {in this case grief over my first significant loss of my life}is through it. " She is correct: I've worked through most of my initial stage of grief, but I realize I'll miss Doc forever because I loved her as a spiritual mother.
Doc, I believe, was ready to meet God. I saw her for the last time a month before she finally died and I felt her weariness. However, that does not mean I don't feel her absence acutely every day.
Additionally, we ran into some stumbling blocks regarding paying for Brian's medicine. {Apparently specialty pharmacies can get away with charging exuberant prices for their products.} We've thankfully found a way to get the needed financial aid for Brian's medicine, and for this I am grateful.
Along with my husband and church community, piano has been a constant source of hope and renewal for me. I've taken the discipline of playing my prayers each morning as part of my prayer time. Making music has been physical, emotional, and spiritual therapy for me. It matters not if I play pieces from my Easy Hymns book, my Disney Songs for Beginners book, some sheet music I'd bought, or working on my favorite Beatles' song.
Making music in any way IS a form of connecting with our Creator-- as a person who has sang in choir most of my life, I've always known that music connects us to our Creator. Even something as basic as playing 8-finger scales {a task that my clumsy hands are not fond of completing} connects me to Abba Creator
Piano, since it is still new to me, demands that I bring my full self to the bench. My mind focuses on reading the music and coordinating with my hand and finger muscles to play the correct notes. Additionally, I have discovered that playing pieces that I know well helps me settle into a peaceful, contemplative mood.
The words of the Lennon/ McCartney song serve as a prayer in their own right.
When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom
Let it be
And in my hour of darkness
She is standing right in front of me
Speaking words of wisdom
Let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
Whisper words of wisdom
Let it be
And when the broken-hearted people
Living in the world agree
There will be an answer
Let it be
For though they may be parted there is
Still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer
Let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
Yeah, there will be an answer
Let it be
At my piano bench, I find a sacred space-- a space that is as sacred as any church nave-- where I meet The Holy. I lay down my burdens and... Let It Be.
Amen.
Sarah Beth McCarren
Lent 2 2023.
No comments:
Post a Comment